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Post by mrsvalden on Dec 27, 2007 18:24:01 GMT -5
And here is our niece, Haley, on Christmas Day with my mother-in-law. My MIL would freak if she knew I was posting this where people could see. But the poor thing has been in the nursing home for months recovering from a staph infection in her newly replaced knee, then other infection after other infection, etc. She was only able to come to the house for a few hours on Christmas in a wheelchair. So it's understandable that she doesn't have makeup on, etc. She's pretty vain though, so it's hard on her. I just wish every shirt that Haley wore wasn't tight and form-fitting. One of her uncles said something after she left about not wanting to see that much of his niece ever again. His daughters are 10 and 7. We'll see what they are wearing in 5 years. Mrs. V (Carol)
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Post by mrsvalden on Dec 27, 2007 18:37:40 GMT -5
Here's another picture of Haley demonstrating what I mean about her clothes. I believe this was a dress that she wore to Homecoming or something at school. Eep! My husband about flipped when he saw this one.
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Post by nakisha on Dec 28, 2007 7:43:30 GMT -5
Hmm.. In Holland, it's not so strange for teens to wear such clothes. Although I'll admid; that last dress shows a lot. But still. She's a very pretty young lady!! I sure hope she'll be fine after reading all about her... When I look at her, something in me wants to tell her about all the mistakes I made when I was about her age, hoping she won't make the same ones, but I know that wouldn't help. We can't put her in a bubble and protect her from the world... all we can do is hope she'll be strong enough to make the right decisions in life, and catch her if she falls. But from what I've read, she seemes like a strongwilled lady who knows what she wants. I think she'll be just fine!
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Post by mrsvalden on Feb 9, 2008 20:33:44 GMT -5
My nephew, Daniel, turned 2 on Thursday. Their party is actually next Saturday, but his mom made him cupcakes for his actual birthday (even though he didn't understand.) Zach turns 5 later this month. Here he is with a cupcake...
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Post by liquid07 on Feb 9, 2008 22:14:17 GMT -5
Happy Birthday to him !! What a cutie !!
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Post by mrs"e" on Feb 10, 2008 12:51:10 GMT -5
He's a doll!
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Post by Bibi on Feb 10, 2008 15:27:06 GMT -5
I loved the moustache!!! He is really cute!!!
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Post by mrsvalden on Feb 11, 2008 17:10:55 GMT -5
Thanks everyone. I tend to think he's adorable too, but I'm a little biased.
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Post by Little Pet Crazy on Feb 11, 2008 17:21:19 GMT -5
Well since I don't have any boys he's just the cutest. Hope he doesn't grow out of picture taking like your other nephew.
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Post by mrsclean987 on Feb 11, 2008 17:23:42 GMT -5
My nephew, Daniel, turned 2 on Thursday. Their party is actually next Saturday, but his mom made him cupcakes for his actual birthday (even though he didn't understand.) Zach turns 5 later this month. Here he is with a cupcake... Awww!! I just wanna give him a big ol' kiss and pinch his cute little cheeks!! What a sweetheart!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIEL!!! Aunt Judy
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Post by mrsvalden on Feb 11, 2008 17:29:49 GMT -5
I'm so upset right now. Our niece, Haley, is absolutely miserable living with her mom. Her mom is one of the worst mothers I've ever known personally. She is not often physically abusive, but she is constantly emotionally/verbally abusive. She torments Haley just for fun, it seems. Her mom, Missy, is a white trash piece of crap. And she doesn't want her kids to turn out any better than her. And when she sees how bright and capable Haley is, it really bugs her. So she's constantly trying to drag her back down to Missy's level. I've watched it go on for too long. Haley's dad (one of my husband's brothers) is also a loser. He's not mean and spiteful like Missy, he's just a deadbeat. He lives in my in-laws' basement, because he doesn't work and has no way to support himself or his kids. So he's never tried to get custody of Haley.
Haley wants to get out of her mom's house, but she has never really pushed leaving, because she's worried about her little brother (he belongs to a different father, who is also not married to Missy.) She doesn't want to leave him alone with Missy. Well, it's gotten so bad that she needs to leave. She is going to have to let her brother's dad worry about him, and she needs to worry about herself.
This weekend her mom pulled a ridiculous stunt, that I'm not going to get into the details of, but it was absolutely ridiculous. And Haley is an absolute mess. I've told her that if she doesn't go and live with my in-laws, I'm going to call Child and Family Services and have them get involved. I wish my mother-in-law was well and at home, instead of the nursing home with knee problems, because she would help Haley out more than my brother-in-law or father-in-law. They HAVE to step in. They have to!!
She got into it again with her mom after school, and it was so bad she called my father-in-law and he came to get her. He said something about going to court and getting her taken away from her mom, but Haley doesn't know if it will work. Well, it will be messy, but I don't see how they could not allow her to live with her grandparents/dad. I have so many instances of neglect and emotional abuse that I could talk about.
For God's sake, they won't even give the girl enough money for lunches. She goes without lunch half the time. When I found out I gave her $10, and she spread that out over almost 2 weeks. And yet they can buy cigarettes, beer, and pot! And yes, they leave the pot laying around the house where Haley sees it and could smoke it if she wanted to.
The police were called last year when her step-dad threw a beer bottle at her. Now why didn't the cops do something then? Why didn't they report to DCFS? The step-dad was put in jail for the night, but they let the kids stay there with the mom. I guess because it wasn't Missy who did something that time.
I'm not even making sense now. I'm so upset I can't see straight. I was talking to Ken (my karate brother-in-law) about it, and I broke down. I couldn't finish my conversation with him. Then I called Haley, and she was crying and I broke down again. I told her that I need her to leave her mom's house and move in with my in-laws. Because I am worried sick constantly about her. I need to know she's somewhere safe. And I really don't think her mom will fight her living with her dad. If she would just do it. She says she would, but she didn't fight it when her older sister left to live with them for a while. So I don't think she will this time. She just has to get the courage up to leave.
And I guess I'm frustrated, because I don't see how Haley doesn't just want to get out. I don't see why she doesn't just pack her bags and go. She has a loving place to stay. Why put yourself through that if you don't have to. Her mom gives her nothing but trouble and heartache. Nothing. And I think she wants to get away from her mom, but something seems to be holding her back. I don't know if it's her little brother or what.
I know she doesn't like being at my in-laws as much without her grandma there. And it will still be a couple months before she could come home. And I know she doesn't like it there as much now that one of my other brothers-in-law died there a couple years ago. But it has to be better than the hell that she's living in there.
Anyway, I'm so sick with worry, I can't stand it. I should go to karate tonight, but I just want to stay home and cry. She's not going, because she doesn't feel up to it. She only got a couple hours of sleep last night.
Please, if you are the praying type, please pray for Haley that she gets out of that situation quickly. She told me she would leave tomorrow night. I really hope she does.
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Post by mrsvalden on Feb 11, 2008 17:32:59 GMT -5
Oh, and believe me, she would be living with us if we were closer. We live in a town about 40 minutes away, and she doesn't want to leave her school and friends to come live with us.
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Post by ♥ Kathryn ♥ on Feb 11, 2008 17:39:45 GMT -5
I'm so upset right now. Our niece, Haley, is absolutely miserable living with her mom. Her mom is one of the worst mothers I've ever known personally. She is not often physically abusive, but she is constantly emotionally/verbally abusive. She torments Haley just for fun, it seems. Her mom, Missy, is a white trash piece of crap. And she doesn't want her kids to turn out any better than her. And when she sees how bright and capable Haley is, it really bugs her. So she's constantly trying to drag her back down to Missy's level. I've watched it go on for too long. Haley's dad (one of my husband's brothers) is also a loser. He's not mean and spiteful like Missy, he's just a deadbeat. He lives in my in-laws' basement, because he doesn't work and has no way to support himself or his kids. So he's never tried to get custody of Haley. Haley wants to get out of her mom's house, but she has never really pushed leaving, because she's worried about her little brother (he belongs to a different father, who is also not married to Missy.) She doesn't want to leave him alone with Missy. Well, it's gotten so bad that she needs to leave. She is going to have to let her brother's dad worry about him, and she needs to worry about herself. This weekend her mom pulled a ridiculous stunt, that I'm not going to get into the details of, but it was absolutely ridiculous. And Haley is an absolute mess. I've told her that if she doesn't go and live with my in-laws, I'm going to call Child and Family Services and have them get involved. I wish my mother-in-law was well and at home, instead of the nursing home with knee problems, because she would help Haley out more than my brother-in-law or father-in-law. They HAVE to step in. They have to!! She got into it again with her mom after school, and it was so bad she called my father-in-law and he came to get her. He said something about going to court and getting her taken away from her mom, but Haley doesn't know if it will work. Well, it will be messy, but I don't see how they could not allow her to live with her grandparents/dad. I have so many instances of neglect and emotional abuse that I could talk about. For God's sake, they won't even give the girl enough money for lunches. She goes without lunch half the time. When I found out I gave her $10, and she spread that out over almost 2 weeks. And yet they can buy cigarettes, beer, and pot! And yes, they leave the pot laying around the house where Haley sees it and could smoke it if she wanted to. The police were called last year when her step-dad threw a beer bottle at her. Now why didn't the cops do something then? Why didn't they report to DCFS? The step-dad was put in jail for the night, but they let the kids stay there with the mom. I guess because it wasn't Missy who did something that time. I'm not even making sense now. I'm so upset I can't see straight. I was talking to Ken (my karate brother-in-law) about it, and I broke down. I couldn't finish my conversation with him. Then I called Haley, and she was crying and I broke down again. I told her that I need her to leave her mom's house and move in with my in-laws. Because I am worried sick constantly about her. I need to know she's somewhere safe. And I really don't think her mom will fight her living with her dad. If she would just do it. She says she would, but she didn't fight it when her older sister left to live with them for a while. So I don't think she will this time. She just has to get the courage up to leave. And I guess I'm frustrated, because I don't see how Haley doesn't just want to get out. I don't see why she doesn't just pack her bags and go. She has a loving place to stay. Why put yourself through that if you don't have to. Her mom gives her nothing but trouble and heartache. Nothing. And I think she wants to get away from her mom, but something seems to be holding her back. I don't know if it's her little brother or what. I know she doesn't like being at my in-laws as much without her grandma there. And it will still be a couple months before she could come home. And I know she doesn't like it there as much now that one of my other brothers-in-law died there a couple years ago. But it has to be better than the hell that she's living in there. Anyway, I'm so sick with worry, I can't stand it. I should go to karate tonight, but I just want to stay home and cry. She's not going, because she doesn't feel up to it. She only got a couple hours of sleep last night. Please, if you are the praying type, please pray for Haley that she gets out of that situation quickly. She told me she would leave tomorrow night. I really hope she does. I'm sorry to hear that. It must be so hard for her, and you! I will be praying that she will get a loving home to live in. Again, I'm sorry to hear all this. *hugs*
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Post by mrs"e" on Feb 11, 2008 17:40:51 GMT -5
The reason she's not as anxious to leave as you want her to go, is probably because she's so used to living in the situation, she can't see how bad it really is, and how much it could get better. Try to make her realize the severity of it all. I'm sorry you're in this situation, and I hope it gets better. I'm not the praying type, but I CAN listen. I love you, Carol-San. PM or call me anytime. -Elizabeth
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krycheck
White Mouse
:-* humble servant to the kiss of death :-*
Posts: 333
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Post by krycheck on Feb 11, 2008 17:41:57 GMT -5
Haley is very pretty and I know what it is like to have a mom like that. It is very hard to get through.
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